Orientation Week: Day 2 - The Socially Awkward Male

It is day two of Orientation Week here at Moorlands and already my social skills are beginning to mess with me. Thank God I have the internet to be my normal insane self on, without it I'd be in prison. 
Wait... I didn't mean that...

There is a strange experience some of my fellow internet dwellers may well understand, this is my Cherries version of 'Socially Awkward Male Enters Room Full of Many People He Does Not Know'... 

You have an overwhelming desire to both leave and try to get to know people at the same time, this confuses you. Hunting around to try to find someone to talk to you realise that you are rather waiting for someone to actively make the effort to come and talk to you. Realising that you have placed yourself in that situation, no-one in the room has any social obligation to talk to you, especially if they are already engaged in conversation. You walk slowly through the room stopping awkwardly every so often to look at people and remember how unlikely it is you can legitimately enter their conversation. You reach the far side of the room.
Entering the kitchen you walk rapidly to the cupboard and remove a mug, now you have a safety blanket. Moving across to the teabags you allow yourself an inner sigh of relief, there is now a valid agenda to you having entered the room. You take as long as possible making your cup of tea, stirring constantly and carefully draining the teabag of as much fluid as possible before taking it to the bin. 
Lifting the mug to your lips you remember it is hot and blow on it to save face. A miracle occurs! You notice somebody that you know you can have meaningless conversation with who isn't involved in any other form of socialising in the room, perhaps their previous conversant needed to urinate or defecate. You casually stroll over and pretend you only just noticed them, a conversation begins, it is normally a meaningless one which the other party is desperate to get out of. You notice a conversation happening which you could have meaningful input to. You look over and see someone inputting, you realise your input would be both unwanted and unnecessary. 
Turning back to your safety blanket you notice that they have realised you don't really want to talk to them. They leave on a pretense. 
Stranded you smile awkwardly at a female you have never met, get terrified that they think you're flirting with them so you walk quickly away out of danger into the safety of the corridor, the glorious embrace of solitude. You insert your left headphone, decide your right ear will be your 'welcoming' ear and walk slowly around the college trying to look as if you're going somewhere.


Day 2 has been fun.


For now I leave you with love,


The Rambler